How Change Happens

“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.”

Buckminster Fuller

According to Arlene Harder in her book, Ask Yourself Questions and Change Your Life, (1)

there are three forces that generally motivate change.

Push

Pull

 Pain 

Jonathan Fields adds a fourth-

Death. (2)

Whenever we nag, coerce or demand another to change, we are utilizing the push force. Domestic violence, as well as violence committed in our streets, are examples of an escalated push force. On a larger scale, the push force is seen in acts of war between countries.

While the perpetrator of push force may experience a temporary sense of power, control and ability to effect change in others, it comes at a cost. Resistance, feelings of powerlessness, resentment, and anger in the receiver (victim) ultimately creates division and separation.

Personally and collectively.

   Pain can be highly motivating.

Most of us seek to find ways to relieve the suffering we experience as a result of psychological/physical pain. ie. serious illness or divorce.

Similarly, when we observe/experience the effects of environmental degradation, catastrophe, and poverty, it  can motivate collective change.

 Pain can bring awareness to ways we may have been off course and motivate the corrective action needed to improve our lives. 

But, it is painful.

Historically, push and pain forces have been powerful motivators for change on the planet.

Often, the cost has been quite high…

destruction, division, disconnection but a few of the outcomes of the the push/pain choices.

However, when we invite, inspire and magnetize others towards positive changes (pull), we empower  individuals while creating connections with others of a similar bandwidth. Those who form effective, cooperative, live giving, vibrant networks inspire and offer templates for others to follow. 

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 “Not infrequently, when we have been inspired by a new vision of who we can grow to be, and what the world can become through our efforts, we are pulled to change.” Arlene Harter

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This website is about the Pull Force.

It is about inviting and inspiring change.

Periodically it can be useful to contemplate the question

“If I only had six months to live, what would I most want to do for myself, my family and friends and the world?”

Death can pull us to clarify, inform and motivate us to place what matters most front and center in our lives.

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“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” Steve Jobs

Turning our attention steadily toward what we genuinely and authentically want to create for ourselves and the world, not only empowers us, it uplifts us in the process… 

and, inspires others. 

Change may continue to be incremental or it may take sudden leaps, but the choice to expand, grow and change will begin to rewire our brains, creating new pathways so we continue to see our world anew.

And, contribute to the evolution of humankind.

Releasing Old Push/Pain Paradigms

Since the people, places, and activities we choose to engage with most in our daily life can influence our motivation to create positive changes, it makes sense to evaluate those areas of our lives and make adjustments from time to time.  

For example, if you find the media you are exposing yourself to leaves you discouraged, depressed and feeling hopeless, you might consider unplugging from or taking a break from these sources that keep you focused on push/pain paradigms.  In its place, try nourishing yourself with positive, life-affirming news  (hint….you are in one), and notice how you feel!

“There is a new story waiting to be born, waiting to redeem the planet and nourish our souls. It is a story of a oneness that includes the diversity of creation in a self-sustaining whole, a story that can bring back the magic within nature that is needed to heal our damaged planet. It is a story of co-operation rather than competition or conflict. And it includes the mystery of life as well as the understanding that science can give us. It is also a new story, arising from deep within the psyche of humanity and the world soul at this moment in our and its evolution. We are not the sole creators of this story, because it is the story of life evolving, recreating itself anew, but we are needed to midwife it into existence. As with all births it needs to come from the inner to the outer world.” 

Llewellyn Vaughan-Lee

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“We change the world not by what we say or do, but as a consequence of what we have become.” 

David Hawkins

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